It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
third nipple confirmed
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Randomize
