just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
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Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
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He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum