Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
You're earring is so big in my mouth
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
you had me at cake vodka
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize