i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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