would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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