Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
