It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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