question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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