That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
