His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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