Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
