if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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