I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
