I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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