too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
