Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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