so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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