I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize