White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize