it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
