Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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