I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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