Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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