Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
