Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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