i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
