I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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