i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
