She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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