How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
