how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
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Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
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Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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