I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
