Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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