It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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