so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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