omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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