bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize