sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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