Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
