you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
