I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
