quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
