I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
