I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
