People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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