Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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