Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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