Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
