I'm eating all of the evidence.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
