YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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