omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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