Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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